rollercoaster of a week

This week has been such a rollercoaster for me. I mean, at first, it started out alright, I guess. I just felt like normal.
Then my mom called me first thing in the morning to tell me that my gran wasn't doing so hot, lost her will to live, and that she doesn't like my soon to be living arrangements. How many blows do you think I can take in five minutes? Someone's mastered low blows, and I don't know what the usage of that is...
anyway, then I go to work, kind of indifferent about life, but trying to play as though I'm actually having a lot of fun.

Then I'm at work, and I learn some disturbing things. Mainly, though, that one of my co workers, if she'd have seen me on the street in her neighborhood, she'd probably kill me in cold blood because of some black dude who held her up at gunpoint when she was twelve (another one held her mom up at the same time, I guess), so she grew up scared of black people, and she has a permit for her gun. All I've ever done is be black and understand spanish - all of this took place in English, though, right after she said "oh, no offense (to me)", and carried on with the story.

Well, the next day another co worker, after hearing me vent about it (I didn't use names) to another coworker, apologized to me on her behalf, and just that night, I was texting with another coworker who helped me not think much about it anymore. But it was really weird that I saw the girl who said that yesterday limping at work, so I asked if she was okay, I mean, I'm not the racist here, so I figure I can still be a decent person and ask, but she gave me a snotty look, so Idk...

well, I found out that my gran died hours ago, so...I'm not the happiest of campers, but Aiden has been entertaning me right well today. ^_^ So glad to have a great BF like him. :D

party pooping debbie downers

have you ever thought about the term party pooper? I'd rather not after typing that.


anyway, so many people are way the hell too negative, just last night I got talked down to at work for something that really wasn't too big of a deal, but that girl must have been having a bad day to begin with, but I left sooner than she did so it doesn't matter. But that's not what I wanna talk about.

I wanna talk about people who get sooooooooooooooooooo upset because something doesn't go their way. grow the hell up, no one gets what they want all of the time, oops, that's one new years resolution down...the swearing, well, I can fix that later, but anyway.

I'm seriously trying to stay positive, but there's always someone around who's talking about angry, upsetting things. They even turn holidays into poopfests because they can. Who gets joy out of that? No one. It's so much easier to be happy, at least, it's supposed to be, I think it's supposed to be, anyway. I'd like ti to be. one thing I really want is just somone who's always happy to just explode happy into my day, maybe not everyday, but most of them like, six days out of the week.

I'm just tired of feeling drianed by everyone's negative bullshit. I didn't ask for it, I don't want it, and I definitely don't need it. Especially when I've resolved to be happy. If you're pissed off because you feel like the world just shat on you (a of all) it probably didn't, b of all), find something else to do, like look at all the good shit you have going on. If you really can't find one thing...damn, dude...I dont' know what to tell you. but most people can find at least five things, and that really can be enough to make your day go by a bit better.) ...but don't bring that angsty crap around me. that shit should have died with your teenage years, but I guess some people never grow up.

anyway, if you even think about saying negative shit around me, just stfu because I'm sick of it. I hear it every day I cannot enunciate this enough EVERY DAY. Must I spell it? No, I dont' want to, that's too much work, I'm just gonna do some stretches, maybe a few sets of squats, and ...make my spongebob macaroni ^____________________________________________________^...or the madagascar lion one...it looked cooler hee heehee

anyway, sorry to down you all. I hope you all had a splendid mlk day, I had a great shopping trip, kk, tafn, bye bye til later. I wish I could post daily for y'all. maybe another time, but buhbyez for real, lovies. <3